For most people, divorce is a devastating experience that leaves you with a lot of unanswered questions. What went wrong? How could this happen to us? Why didn’t we see this coming? Divorce can leave you feeling alone, rejected, and even unloved.
After all, your marriage is the most intimate relationship you have. It’s natural to feel anxious about your future after divorce. However, things won’t stay that way forever. There are ways to get through this period quicker and more easily than you think. Let’s look at six reasons why people divorce and what to do about it if you find yourself in a similar situation.
1. Communication breakdowns
One of the most common causes of divorce is communication breakdowns. When you’re married, you and your spouse are constantly exchanging verbal and nonverbal messages. You may say one thing but hope your spouse will read between the lines and understand a different message. Unfortunately, this can lead to misunderstandings that are difficult to repair.
Communication is a vital aspect of any relationship, especially marriage. In order for things to work out, you need to communicate with each other on a regular basis. Talk about what happened during your day and how it made you feel so there won’t be any surprises or misrepresentations of how you’re feeling. It’s important for both partners to make their thoughts clear so the other partner understands them.
2. Financial disparity
Financial disparity is another common reason for divorce. When one person in the marriage is responsible for paying the bills while the other isn’t, tension often builds over time. It’s easy to let feelings of resentment build up when you don’t have control over your financial situation and are struggling to make ends meet.
If you think this type of disparity might be an issue for you, talk to your spouse about it before tensions reach a breaking point. You should also look at your budget together and see if there are any areas where you can cut back so that both people in the marriage feel like they’re financially contributing equally.
3. Sexless marriages
Sexless marriages are another common cause of divorce. Sex-related issues often arise after having children or being stressed from work, but it’s important that you try to find time each week to reconnect with your spouse on this level. If sex has become a problem in your relationship, try coming up with some solutions together.
Maybe another person could stay home with the kids? Or maybe during weekends you could swap days off? Whatever solution feels right for you and makes sense in terms of scheduling, just do it! Sex is an important part of any healthy marriage and it can help increase intimacy between partners. But in the case of pain during sex or other health issues that affect your sex life, it is better to contact a doctor.
4. Loss of romance and intimacy
When relationships turn stale and boring, it’s not uncommon to seek excitement elsewhere. If you find that romance and intimacy are two things you don’t share anymore with your partner, it may be time to consider the possibility of divorce. It’s important to keep in mind that this isn’t a quick fix. Divorce should only be considered when there is no hope for reconciliation with your spouse.
Affair is one of the most common reasons why people divorce. If you suspect that your partner is cheating, it’s best to confront them. Sometimes, a spouse may not be aware that their husband or wife is being unfaithful. They may think that they are just going out with friends but in reality, the spouse is secretly seeing someone else.
Or, if you have been on a long business trip and come back to find that your spouse has been on multiple dates and has a lot of romantic messages on their phone, then infidelity may be present. It can be difficult to confront someone you love but it’s necessary if you have suspicions about their fidelity.
6. Irreconcilable differences
Divorce is often the result of irreconcilable differences. Sometimes people don’t want to admit that they are not happy and just want out. These marriages often end in divorce because one or both of the spouses simply want a change. They might be unhappy with their careers, family situation, or even their marriage.
But, these are all things that can be changed if you decide to make the effort. For example, if you’re unhappy with your job, you could try to find a new one; if you’re unhappy with your family situation, you could try to improve it; if you’re unhappy with your marriage, you could try counseling.